Murphy, CE Walker Papers 2 Thunderbird Falls

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No. My voice cracked, and I put on my best brave smile in return. But I can pretend.
She patted my shoulder. Come on, then.
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There s my girl. Gary s voice was too thin, his gray eyes dulled, but he smiled as I put my hand into
his. Power fluttered very gently inside me as we touched, and I nearly burst into tears at the realization
that there might actually be something I could do. I held off for a minute, though, hanging on to Gary s
hand.
Your girl, huh? I sat down on a stool beside his bed, trying not to sniffle. When d I graduate from
being a crazy dame to being your girl?
Right about the time my arm started tingling and aching, Gary said. He looked like he d lost thirty
pounds in the eight hours since I d seen him. His skin was ashy, the Hemingway wrinkles that I found so
reassuring now deep and haggard around his mouth and eyes. You look like hell, Jo.
I gave a shaky laugh. I look like hell? Anybody shown you a mirror, Gary?
They don t need to. I m feelin like the old gray ghost.
Yeah, well. I tightened my fingers around his. No giving up that ghost, okay? Not for a while yet.
Gary snorted. You kidding? You ve only just gotten started. I m not plannin on checking out for a
while yet. I want grandkids, he said with a wink and a sudden grin. My heart lurched.
That s why you re hanging around, huh? Nice to finally find out there s a reason. My attempt at levity
fell flat, but Gary smiled anyway, then let his eyes close, which told me as much as anything how tired he
was. I d never met a more open-eyed kind of guy than Gary. We stayed like that for a few minutes, me
trying to memorize him while he breathed, then I closed my own eyes, hoping I wouldn t cry.
Lissen, Jo.
My eyes popped open again. Gary was wearing his serious face. His really serious face, so serious I d
never seen it before. Nerves twisted in my stomach. Yeah?
The grandkids, y know I m joking. But
God, Gary, don t. Okay? Don t get all maudlin on me. I managed a feeble smile. At least wait until
you re sitting up again, okay? I made the smile brighter, even though tears stung my eyes, and I bent
over his hand. Anyway, I know, okay? My voice squeaked. I know. Me, too, huh? Okay? Me, too. I
blinked back tears, keeping my head lowered over his hand. Gary reached over himself with his left hand,
clonking my head with the oxygen sensor on his middle finger as he ruffled my hair. Ow.
He chuckled. Sorry. Okay. Arright, Jo. Now you gotta keep me up to date on what s goin on out there,
all right? I hate missin things.
I sat up laughing and brushed my hand over my eyes. I know. I will, I promise. Like, here, you ll like
this. I was talking to Virissong, the spirit guy the coven wants to bring across, when the hospital called.
Gary s eyebrows retained their bushiness even when the rest of him looked smaller. What s he like?
He seems okay. I guess I m going to do this.
Man, Gary said, I gotta get out of here. I m gonna miss all the good stuff.
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Only you think it s the good stuff. I gave him a watery smile. When re they letting you out?
I donno. A cute blond nurse says I gotta go to physical therapy. Me, physical therapy. I m seventy-three
years old. What kinda crap is that?
The kind that s going to make sure you live to see seventy-four, I said sternly. Gary s eyes brightened,
as if chastisement was better for him than sympathy. It probably was.
You re gonna keep me in line, aren t you, he grumbled, without disguising the note of pleasure in his
voice.
Damn straight. I took a deep breath. And I m going to do a little laying on of hands, and then I m
going to ask a power animal to keep an eye on you.
If somebody d said that to me, it would ve made me even crabbier. Gary lit up again. Yeah? What
animal?
I ll know when it comes. Tomorrow morning. The part of me that knew I wouldn t really turn my back
on shamanism stung me with cold guilt. If I d studied maybe I could ve seen this coming and done
something to prevent it. Preemptive healing.
Stop it, Gary said. I twitched and blinked at him. You re lookin all guilty, he said. Knock it off. I m
an old man, Jo. I ain t gonna last forever, and there s nothing you or anybody else can do about that. But
I m not checkin out just yet, so just stop it, you hear? You want to find this old dog a little spiritual
support to shore him up, I ll appreciate it, but don t go thinkin you can stop nature in its tracks. You hear
me?
I hear you. I smiled a little. I m just not sure I m ready to listen.
He squeezed my hand. Fair nuff. Women always take their own sweet time makin up their minds to
see sense.
I nodded, then straightened my spine. Hey!
Gary cackled, breathier than usual, but still his own laugh. There s my girl, he said again, and let
himself slip back into resting. I waited until he slept, then dug down inside me for the power that lay
behind my breastbone.
It flickered and murmured, responding sluggishly. I wasn t too sure how to go about repairing a broken
heart. Cosmetic changes, like visualizing a new paint job, seemed inadequate, and the patch replacement
that I d used to fix the hole in my own lung struck me as somehow dangerous. I d been dying at the time.
Screwing up would have only finished the job. If I messed up now, Gary, who wasn t dying, might. My
car analogy was turning out to have limitations I didn t like.
In the end the best I could do was to share my own essence, the way Billy had done with me back in
March. I thought it would help, just by giving him more than his own depleted energy to draw from as he
healed. It took a while to formulate, but I slipped a small, delicate ball of silver rainbows inside Gary s
chest, and wished it Godspeed and good luck.
Then I stayed until a nurse came to usher me out, and went back to my apartment to sob in the shower.
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Routine brought gratifying numbness. I wrote tickets and walked my beat, nodding at locals and stopping
to give directions to tourists. I didn t have to think, which was a godsend. Thinking put me back into that
place where it was too hard to breathe. Gary might ve believed there wasn t anything I could ve done, but
I wasn t so sure.
At lunch I went back to the station instead of stopping on my beat to get a bite to eat. I wasn t hungry,
and I needed comfort smells, grease and oil and gasoline. I went down to the garage, even though I didn t
think I was up to watching Nick carefully not look at me.
It was almost a relief that Thor was the only one around, lying on his back beneath a vehicle. I stood there
by his feet until he slid out to get a wrench from the toolbox by the car. His eyebrows, grease-smeared,
rose a little as he saw me. I looked around, unable to meet his eyes as I mumbled, Wondered if there was
anything I could help out with for a while.
He frowned at me. I looked somewhere else again. Please.
Yeah. His answer was so gruff and so long in coming that I flinched, startled out of trying to think of [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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